Cousins' Party?

Recently I went to a family gathering with my cousins on my mother’s side of the family. It was actually something out of the ordinary. Most of the time, we only got together as a group on holidays or weddings or funerals.

This time, the primary purpose was to say farewell to my aunt who was moving back to her native England. It was kind of a sad occasion. My daughter is quite close to my aunt. But, I suppose, in this day and age, distance is of lessening concern when you think that we can turn on a computer and talk via a web cam. Still, nothing beats seeing family in person.

I had already been thinking about it when my one cousin suggested having a cousins’ party once a year. It’s something we do with some irregularity with my wife’s family. It would be great to have that family closeness. It’s something I’ve always wanted and something that would be good for my daughter to get to know where she comes from.

It would be easy to have my cousins from my mother’s side get together every year. I wouldn’t even mind having it at my own home to have some traditional consistency. It seems that may be what it will take to continue the cousins’ party with my wife’s family. But for the cousins on my father’s side there is a singular problem.

My cousins from dad are scattered all over the country. Like me, they mostly come from modest means. Having a tradition where we all get together every year would be almost impossible, as well as a logistical nightmare. What I was thinking about for this side of the family that we have something about every other year or every five years and all get together in a central location.

It still may be problematic, though I would seriously consider it. Save up for it like a special vacation. I have some cousins on this side of the family that I have never met. Some I have not seen in years. And I worry that the distance, both geographical and emotional, will serve only to drive us further apart.

I want to be a part of my cousins’ lives. I want them to be a part of mine. I want to be able to look and see – to know – my family. As much of them as I can. Maybe it’s a dream I can place in the “some day” column of my life. But it’s a dream I don’t think I can give up on. If I don’t care or try, how can I expect others in my family to care. And then what will become of the family?